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Interview Job Cohen TimeOutAmsterdam March, 2010
Mar 29th, 2010 by greg

TIMEOUTAMSTERDAM PRINT VERSION MARCH 2010

Still don’t know what’s at stake in this month’s city council elections? Local comedian and political observer Greg Shapiro chatted with the one city official who’s not chosen by voters: MAYOR JOB COHEN

If you’re in the mood to practice your Dutch, here’s a great word for you: gemeenteraadsverkiezingen. That’s 25 letters, folks, meaning city council elections. But what do they matter really? Here’s what: can we drink a beer outside? Can we shop on Sundays? Will they ever finish that demned Metro line?

Some voters fear that Amsterdam is losing its edge, it’s identity. New rules about social conduct, most of them coming from Den Haag, affect the way we live in Amsterdam. The police now have the right to search us, coffeeshops now have more restrictions and smokers are pretty much verboden. Can we expect more resistance from the new city council against the Den Haag measures?

Ultimately, Den Haag and Amsterdam want the same thing. Mostly, we want to make sure that kids are not getting their hands on soft drugs. And that goes for alcohol too.

But what about adults and alcohol? The ‘Ai!Amsterdam’ movement has made a lot of noise about the crackdown on terraces and opening hours for bars, restaurants and clubs.

[Ai! Amsterdam] complained that the rules were too strict on drinking a beer outside. So in the past year, we’ve allowed more possibilities for terraces. In fact, there’s been a huge push to expand the plans for recreation. But where Amsterdam is uniquely strong – was, is and always will be – is in the balance between living, working and recreation. There’s always going to be give-and-take. We’ve heard complaints from residents that terraces are too loud. We invited Ai! Amsterdam to attend a discussion with the residents’ group, but they weren’t interested. There has to be balance.

Luckily for all parties, one public nuisance has largely disappeared recently: the Brits. Thanks to the crisis and a historically low Pound, no more drunken louts and late-night singing bouts. But is Amsterdam at all worried that it’s not pulling them in like it used to?

I was just saying the other day at the Provincial meeting: do you know how many English-speaking expats we have in Amsterdam? Over 10 per cent. We do a lot with expats in mind. That’s why we created the Expat Center [Zuid/WTC]. There’s been an enormous increase in the creative sector in Amsterdam, even during the crisis. We support the dynamic expansion of people in the creative industry, and in the financial industry. These are not unimportant areas. Amsterdam is a unique city. People get the feeling that they can realize their talents in a special way. And we will continue to keep it like this.

Okay, and how about the North-South Metro Line? As if the financial crisis wasn’t bad enough, the line is causing huge budget shortfalls – and everybody is feeling it. At least 500 civil servants are being cut, construction projects are being cut, arts funding is being cut.

Budget crises are inevitable, and right now every city has one. We are trying to be as forthcoming as we can. We’ve made a public menu-card of options for creating savings and creating revenue. It’s election time, and every party had had its say. Now we need decisions.

Does this mean stopping construction on the North South line? While it seems logical to some, your party, the labour party, PvdA maintains that it would cost the same to go back as to go forward.

Personally, I think we’ve come too far to stop now. Yes, it’s messy, yes it’s expensive. But developing the city always is. Grit your teeth, keep going, and hope that it’s done as soon as possible.

Curiously, and somewhat scandalously given the circumstances, the national government in Den Haag has put off their budget cuts until June, during the World Cup. What do you make of that?

We need results sooner. Forming a city coalition does not take as long as a national coalition. Amsterdam needs decisions in March and April. This is a time of tightening our budget, and eliminating waste. Someone will always be unhappy. But we all need to work together, and we will be as forthcoming as possible.

You’ve got an anniversary coming up – 10 years of being the Mayor of Amsterdam. Any goals for your next 10 years?

There will always be people who say ‘Amsterdam isn’t the same, it’s terrible.’ But I’m happy with where this city is going. In terms of social harmony, working/living/recreation – and the enormous increase in the creative sector recently – Amsterdam is [still] a unique place, and in fact a driving force in Europe.

Mad at Madoff
Jun 30th, 2009 by greg

$50 billion missing. 150 years in jail… I think we now know what’s wrong with the US financial AND justice systems in the same headline.

150 years. What does that even mean? How old is he already? Any prison sentence beyond ‘life in prison’ is meaningless. Unless you’re going to miraculously prolong his life: ‘we will spare no expense to ensure that the man who ruined your pension and savings will live longer than any of you . BUT he will be in prison.’

Life sentence or death. Make up your mind. Why should we need to subject anyone to ‘consecutive life sentences?’ Unless you’re going to kill Bernie Madoff, then reanimate him, then kill him again, then bring him back as a zombie, then create an avatar of Madoff so that the avatar Madoff has to watch as we kill the zombie Madoff! And then we kill his family! … actually this idea has merit.

I just want the money back! It’s not like we don’t know where it is. Get his wife up on the stand. Get his kids, I don’t care. Whatever money is left, try to rebuild the lives that you ruined.  In fact…

What good is Madoff in jail? Make him go back to work! Make him earn another $50 billion and pay it back! Make him single-handedly kick-start the economy. Imagine the effect that would have on the banks and lenders… if we could read the headline: Madoff repays $50 billion. NOW he can go to jail.

Or just sentence him to consecutive 150-year sentences or some bullshit, watch him go to some minimum-security lock-up and walk in 5 years.

Booooooooooooooooooo.

Obama the Dutch President
May 25th, 2009 by greg

OBAMA, THE DUTCH PRESIDENT
By Greg Shapiro   Jan. 21, 2009

Since Inauguration Day last month, President Obama has had quite a Honeymoon with the press. He probably has another week left to save the world before the US press tears him to shreds. And they may have a point. While some people say: ‘You can’t make fun of Barack Obama,’ I say: ‘YES WE CAN!’

But in Holland, the Honeymoon continues. Why? Because Barack Obama is Dutch.

- It’s true. Some of Obama’s ancestors trace back to the Pilgrims from the 1600s, and they came from Leiden. Yes, when your brand of religion is too extreme even for the Dutch, you move to America. Of course – judging by ancestors – half of Obama’s are Muslim. Just like Holland!

- When Obama was 4 years old, his nanny was a Dutch woman named Ans Michels, who now lives in Nijmegen. Also, Obama has admitted that – in his youth he smoked marijuana (and unlike Clinton, he did inhale). Now there’s no proof that Obama got his weed from Ans, but do you think a Dutch girl went to Hawaii in the 60’s NOT to get high? While Obama shows no signs of following Dutch drug policy, he does a personal addiction to sending emails by ‘Crackberry.’

- Obama likes meetings. When reporters ask for specifics on topics from Afghanistan to Carbon Limits, the answer is ‘We’re having meetings.’ This is Obama at his most-Dutch. Why? Dutch people love meetings! Ask any Dutch person how he feels about meetings, and he’ll tell you: ‘I don’t know. First, I have to have a meeting.’ Then they have to schedule a meeting about the meeting, to see how everyone felt about the meeting.

And – as with the Democrats – the Dutch may have a majority of tolerant, progressive voters – BUT they insist on running from the Right-Wingers with their tails between their legs.

Is Obama really Dutch? You’d have to ask Dutch people. You just have to wait for them to have their meeting.

kantoffis